New Song Center

~I am so honored and humbled to be part of such a wonderful organization. I am a children's  facilitator for the New Song program which is funded by Hospice of the Valley. I am also part of the Speakers Buearu The program is designed to support families and their children that have lost a loved one.The facilitation occurs in age groups: little's, middles, tweens, teens, and adults. We had an amazing year where I witnessed kids go through grief...Sigh! Sometimes while facilitating in my tween group I felt they were teaching more about the beauty of grief, love, and life! Loss is such a big part of life that often times we are never given the tools to learn to cope and make these experiences part of us, especially when we are young! These children touch my heart and it is my passion to continue to do this type of work! Our last meeting as an activity we all planted flowers in our own pots to symbolize our loved ones that had passed on...we talked about the soil, the growth, the fertilizer and how even though we go through grief we grow so much and life supports us always! My pot was for my mother and my doggie Stimpy! They both have left so much in me and I remember them with LOVE! The program is free and it is a great resource for families that are going through this devastating process! So spread the word if families are in need! 

Domestic War?

"In the process of my evolution, I became a victim of domestic war, an emotional casualty for a major portion of my life, entwined, entrapped and emotionally involved, until I learned how to become free".~Sara Niles

~In the United States, More than 1.1 million or 7% of women and 720,000 or 4% of men have been victims of some kind of domestic abuse in the past year, official crime figures reveal. All over the world acts of violence within a family unit occur out of the referenced statistics, there are many that are not reported as speaking out comes with shame, guilt, remorse, and fear. I was recently in a gathering and a very eloquent speaker was talking about abuse, out of the 13 participants in the room of women all but one had experienced some form of sexual, physical, mental, or emotional abuse in their childhood and after. Sigh! Speaking out about abusive experiences takes a lot of courage, as the most darkest times of your shattered life become transparent to opinion, ridicule, or even judgement. It is important that we continue to speak up about these horrific experiences and begin to educate victims on the vicious cycle that entraps them. We all have emotional battles, scars, and trials in our lives...the difference is that when another person inflicts power over and hurts you through acts of violence it is not 'normal' anymore. It becomes a jailhouse! Life becomes all about survival, all about protection, all about coping! The greatest emotional damage is that the individuals that take advantage of you say they love you! They wear you down! You begin to adapt, you begin to believe you are not worthy, you begin to disconnect, you begin to lose what it meant to be free. The victimization becomes a reality! The wounds run deep and the healing takes time, commitment, and work! Becoming a survivor, taking off the shackles of abuse has also been my story...a very traumatic journey that taught me so much! The most important thing has been compassion, mostly for myself! And even though circumstance made us victims, it is important to empower our thinking and know that we survived and stretched to stop the abuse within ourselves even after the fact! Any individual going through these situations, you are not alone! There are resources and help! Lift the veil of fear and Speak up!!! The cycle ends with you!!!

She was a shell

Empty and alone

Where could she go?

Who could she tell?

Was easier to stay

To accept defeat

Everyone told her

That's the way it should be.

They all looked away

and left her alone

they turned their heads

to any broken bones

They told her to be strong

for that was the plan

Her only goal

should be to please her man

She did her best

She gave it her all

When asked "What happened?"

She said

"Oh, Just a fall"

Years went by

she learned to adapt

she learned how not

to make him mad

She learned how to please

Just what to say

She learned to make sure

HE had a good day

Those looking on could not see?

Would not see?

The pain that was so deep inside of me

Was it easier to just look away?

Distance and time

closed for me

there was a hand that

could be reached

A hand with a face

from the past

A hand that only for a

short time would last

I held on to that hand

with all my might

I pulled myself up

I learned how to fight

A year has past

And now I see

just how wonderful

life should be

Written in celebration of my freedom

Dedicated to the face from the past,

✿ܓUnknown, Survivor

Love in Action....Mindfullness in relationships

"An alive relationship is always changing. It has many climates, many moods. It has many surprises. A dead relationship remains stagnant. It is repetitive, it is the same, but then it is no more a relationship. Then you are not two persons, you are two things together. Of course two things never quarrel. The quarrel arises when two persons enter" ~Osho 

~In all of our intimate ventures we are all looking to be valued, loved, and appreciated. Having someone that makes you feel good, someone that you relate too, someone you can trust, someone that you can be yourself with etc..When we are in a relationship with another person, we energetically connect to them, our chakras get connected. In my personal journey of relationships: I have been in dead, abusive, one sided, and co-dependent relationships. All of them were fear based, there was no love in action or live pulse to them. I was repeating my own personal dysfunctional patterns within them, it was a constant stagnation that did not bring any life or action, it was the same quarrel all the time, so it got old, because it was the same story. Quarrel is not bad when it is challenging and inspires growth and sometimes needed help the relationship evolve. When I would attempt to show up to the quarrel it would escalate to fear, but  that was me wanting to step out of the stagnation and looking for change? As children we learn how to show up in relationships, we learn how to survive, how to connect, how to disconnect, how to love, how to be treated etc..As we continue to grow and develop we begin to put our perception of relationships into practice, some of us continue to go through this cycles all our lives, some of us decide that we want change and don't settle for dead relationships. And acknowledge that to keep a relationship alive it needs to continue to change. We begin to observe our own patterns? Learn and value what we offer? And encourage others to do the same within the relationship! Love in action is all about participation! Being love within a dyad and being love in autonomy as well! Love is the greatest motivation and healer of all times! It is the infinite feeling that keeps you connected and committed to yourself and to a relationship. The only constant is change, but it takes a lot of courage to look at ourselves and reflect on how we show up in relationships because its not pretty at times! You grieve, you forgive, you feel lost? But your anchor is love! The distractions we create to keep ourselves from undoing our own lies are the things that keep us in dysfunction! To be alive in love, risks have to be taken, fears have to be conquered, grief has to be felt! That is the only way we can be able to live a full life! Feeling every experience to our core and being able to Learn, Observe, Value, and Encourage!!! Love in action is nothing more than daily self commitment! Action is not always in the doing? It is in the way we approach things? The way we follow through and the way we move forward still participating with our hearts wide open! 

Keep your heart open, your love alive, and your life in motion!!!! The way we relate to others will shift! Just see it happen...

Surrender...

"Man has nothing else to do but to surrender in deep trust, in deep love. Don't be a doer, just surrender. Let there be a let go"

~Letting go is a word that is often used in reference to moving on from someone or something. As human beings we all experience resistance to change and always want or desire something different of what is being offered to us at the present moment by life. So many emotions come to play when we are at the fork on the road to transformation. Surrender does not mean giving up, it means to yield, accept and trust that things are in flux that the intersection is exactly what is needed to enable to you to continue to move forward instead of staying stuck, and welcome unnecessary suffering. We are all offered many opportunities of surrender and often ignore and resist until we find ourselves on our knees by carrying the heavy load. Being clear and accepting reality is sometimes harsh, but it is our only way of committing to the next step. My favorite spiritual coach that I admire dearly Iyanla Vanzant, states that the triple A's will allow you to move through things. Acceptance, Acknowledgement, and Awareness. When we accept the change, we Acknowledge that things will never be the same, we become Aware that life has its ebbs and flows and that holding on to ideas or stories that hinder our lives. The true art of letting go is about commitment! Whether the choice is perceived to be good or bad, committing to it is where you learn to trust yourself. In the practice of yoga, when we commit to a pose as hard or unaligned as it might be at the moment, we commit to it with breath and ease, the more we practice, the more the body will naturally go back to its normal state, but if we are continually telling ourselves you can't do it, this pose is not for you, you aren't flexible enough etc..how will you ever learn to go through the process? You have to trust and let go!!! Breathe and let it be...We don't have to continue to do to feel worthy of our choices, letting go is not the lazy way out, it is way we become accountable and begin a new way of giving and receiving. We restore balance within ourselves! Listening when it is time to let go vs creating chaos in our lives....